Today’s the Day!
After more than a decade of quietly managing incontinence, I’m having sling surgery, a step toward reclaiming a part of my life I didn’t realize I’d adapted so deeply around.
I wrote about this…
A Few Personal Health Updates (Because Maybe They’ll Help You, Too)
You Might Relate to Today’s Substack If…
before, when I tried a less invasive procedure called Bulkamid. It worked, but only for about two days. So, onward to the next option. Yes, it’s more invasive, with a longer recovery and a bit more risk, but also a high success rate!
The hardest part will be stepping away from movement for a couple of months. Thankfully, I’ll still be able to walk, that’s key to my mental health. Movement, even five to ten minutes, can shift how we feel.
My running partner, who’s also an avid reader, stocked me up with books for recovery, including one I’m reading now called Look Again.
The book explores habituation: our tendency to get used to things. As I read, I realized how deeply I’d done that in my own life.
Habituation helps us function and move through life without being constantly overstimulated. It’s what lets us tune out the hum of a refrigerator, the feeling of clothes on our skin, or the chaos of a morning routine so we can focus on what matters. It’s adaptive, protective, and often necessary.
But it can also dull us to what’s most alive in our experience. Think of a doctor or veterinarian: they must hold compassion for their patients while facing loss regularly. To survive that emotional weight, they have to habituate, it’s protective. Yet when that same mechanism seeps into other areas of life: our relationships, our work, our joy; it can keep us from truly living fully.
In my case, I realized I had habituated to something quietly diminishing my quality of life. I’d learned to live with incontinence: only wearing black shorts, heading straight home after runs, layering my car seat with towels, passing on races, throwing away clothes and shoes before they were ready. I’d adapted. It worked. But it wasn’t the life I could be living. And I wonder how much easier life might have been if I hadn’t accepted that “this is just how it is” for so long.
And it made me wonder: where else in life do we get so used to something that we stop noticing it altogether?
This week’s free subscriber recipe!
Pumpkin Soup: This velvety pumpkin soup gets its richness from puréed pumpkin, a touch of cream (or coconut milk), and a blend of warming spices like cinnamon and nutmeg. Serve it with crusty bread + a sprinkle of toasted pepitas!
